Missed Relations

MONDAY, DECEMBER 5, 2011
Missed Relations
To say the least; I miss it all
the little things like random cheer text messages :)
A warn hand in the cold morning
The soft voice always so comforting.
Caring eyes oh so gorgeous.
Fingers running through silky hair.
Flirting quietly
Cuddling in silence
heart felt love notes
The larger things like:
meaningful talks
everlasting support
someone to understand
unconditional love.

Dead End

MONDAY, DECEMBER 5, 2011
Dead End
Feelings for life has changed
wanting to succeed is gone
not being able to not fail is here
Zero it is that's crushed me so
Not even an PinkyPie could make me smile
this frown turned upside down is brought back down to a depressed frown.
I trued and displease, I don't try and still displease.
If hope be a fire then my fire be put out
At one point I had something but gone with the wind it is
like the respect i had for myself
I never will find
maybe I want to but i really wont find it
I'm to lazy to care, to tired to give a damn
If I run dry like pen out of words
misery as i know it, life as you do,
shall end.

Open eyes to the past?

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 30, 2011
Open eyes to the past?
Its along way to the top Success does not come gift wrapped for most. The best example I can come up with is relationships just thinking about it I realize that so far, even though, I am single I have not failed at it. For everyone in my past I have learned something from. Who I am, what I'm looking for in someone else and with each person I learn a little more. Ever expanding. Ever changing. Always looking. In short no one knows what they truly are looking for in their partner, but with each new relationship we learn what characteristics we are looking for and with every unsuccessful relationship we hopefully fine a few characteristics that we do like and learn from them.

Giving Up

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 14, 2011
"whatever, I give up"
Miss Desiree Sirinivas.
"whatever, I give up"
You cant quite now for then you'll have nothing left.
Its gona  be alright
Its gona  be alright
Take the broken wonds and learn to fly
take a sad song and make it better
dont be afraid
anytime you feel the pain
remember don't carry the world on your shoulders

Flying Together

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 31, 2011
Flying Together
Our statuses on single and let's leave it that way. Just be scandalous, let them ask questions. Let's find out what we have and whether it flies or not. For all we know of we jump off a cliff holding hands we could soar as a bald eagle does over a great lake, skimming the waters glassy surface with razor sharp talons. Worst case we crash and burn knowing we tried making it work and we may have the aching heart afterwards we shall keep the life lessons and the memories that we make in the process. This could be a great trip cross country or a disastrous train ride though a treacherous mountain pass. Either way we will come out alive hurt but alive knowing that we had our time whether short lived or everlasting it is ours while we have it.

Life Though a 35mm Lens

MONDAY, AUGUST 29, 2011
Life Though a 35mm Lens

Imagine, a teenage boy sulking from painstaking class hour to painstaking class hour. Not being able to see, being there but not existing, learning but not understanding.  Dipped in a dark and dismal depression, suffocating by the very air that kept me alive, I let myself be known only when it mattered.  This is how freshman and sophomore year trickled by, long months became weeks, and weeks, days. By the 360th day of high school, near lifeless the reached sun beat down on my grueling walk home. Salty beads of sweat trickle of the bridge of my nose. RING RING…RING RING “Hello?”, Lazily answering the boy.
“Hey I’m taking you to enroll at Hamilton. Meet you at Target.” Replied the energetic voice.
Too tired to talk correctly, “Kay, bye.” My gloomy response was released.
            Yes, that sad excuse for a son was me, and for the next three months or so I remain in this dark place. That enrollment interview changed something, yet I was unaware of it. Going through the extensive list of extra classes available was tendering on overwhelming. My choice made, summer came and went as uneventful as a weekend in bed with the flu.
By the end of first hour I had been outcast but the over cocky underclassmen. It was not for a month or so that I found a new perspective on life, a 35mm Pentax K1000. Camera in hand I saw the world around me with a clearer focus. The camera had not simply done that, but it was also a light that lit up that deep dark place I inhabited before. Every open close with the shutter melts my blanket of darkness away. The photo class opened my eyes to show me an entirely new spectrum of colors; that for every negative there is a positive. I felt a strong pull towards sight when before I felt blindness. With the camera and my new-fangled skills I wanted to create warmth that melts smiles to other faces and not just mine. Photography has become my greatest escape from the world’s faults and disarrays, created a trusted safe house from the world’s unjust, malicious ways of life. Through its many lenses I have seen a world that shines and blossoms in every dark shadow. Whether photography has made me a better person in society or just a teen with a brighter outlook on life, it inspires me to do what makes my aching heart warm. The inspiration has birthed a new, extraordinary positive look towards life.
Through every new lens I see a new brighter silver lining on every dark and dismal rain cloud. Losing my mind, clicking away, creating expressions of my safety net for all to see, freedom is created from the confines of each aperture.

True Game of Life

MONDAY, AUGUST 22, 2011
True Game of Life
In life there is no winners, only those who played well for when out time is up death is waiting as the last seconds tick off the clock. The timer is up and what have we lived for? Nothing, the end came, we went. Now your life's Worth's are gone. Maybe you did something great like securing world peace. Six feet under your name lives on weather the kids remember who knows. There is no true winners in life for the ones who played well may only live long and in comfort. Great men may try to defeat death at its own game of life yet final destination gets the deciding say for at the end of the game board there is no vacation island but the cold lingering touch of Death itself.